A Mindful Life In Micro-Moments

 

Do you sometimes feel like you're not doing a great job living a mindful life? What does living a mindful life look like? What does it really look like? Stock images of people meditating can have it appear oh so simple and graceful. The image of someone sitting perfectly upright, aligned, appearing effortless, calm, at ease, and of course, in a beautiful setting, is not what I, generally, know of it. I have meditated in some very beautiful places, but even if I got that part of the picture right, I don't think I imbue what I see in these model meditators or a serene Buddha statue. My hair is a little off, my clothes a bit sloppy, my body a little more full than the people in the pictures, and if I'm outside (like most of these photos), I'm trying hard not to swat at the flies or mosquitos. A mindful life is not so perfect. Thank goodness. This means we can all live it.

For this reason, today I want to encourage the micro-moments of practice that add up to make a truly mindful life. In my mind, a mindful life (or call it a life of grace) involves presence (being in the moment), gratefulness (appreciating what's here), compassion (being able to be with suffering), joy (feeling connected), letting go (remembering impermanence), and the awareness that we are all connected to everyone and everything that is, was, and will be. Sounds like a tall order, but it's really not because we practice in small ways everyday and those micro-moments combined are what make a life a mindful one. We don't have to become something we are not. No huge transformations required. Here are some ideas of what it looks like:

• Meditate daily. This is really not a be a big deal if we don't make it one. It's not mystical or magical. We don't need to set up a special room or get ourselves ready to do it. Keep it simple. Set a timer or show up to a group and practice every day. If all you have is 5 minutes, great. Just do it and make it a habit like brushing your teeth. Those 5, 10, 20 minutes add up and contribute to how present you are in the rest of what you do.
• Bring your attention to your senses in small moments throughout the day. Feel the touch of the silverware as you empty the dishwasher. Hear the sounds of the gravel under your foot. Feel the water on your hands. Stop and smell a flower or the scent of wet trees after a rain. Feel yourself breathing at a stop light, as you listen to your friend, as you wait on line. Practice being present in micro-moments and you will find there is more time, space, and more to enjoy. 
• When you wash your face at night or take a shower, as you touch the different parts of your body, say thank you. Thank you to these arms, these legs, this skin, this back, these eyes for all they do. Without this body, we can't experience this life. No one else will thank your body for all it does, for putting up with all the demands and criticisms we have of it. It does everything it can to heal and keep us going. "Thank you, thank you, thank you." 
• Make note of what was good in the day, of what you created in the day, of what you received in the day. You can change the wording around like I just did to keep it fresh, but no matter what way you phrase it, it gets to the point of seeing goodness and appreciating. Make a note of the feeling behind each thing you name because that's what gratefulness feels like. It's not the thought, but the feeling that matters. And note just how much goes into what you named -- all of the people, resources, elements, conditions that came together for any of it to be. This reminds us of our interconnection. When we remember we are connected we tend to be kinder, more generous, more forgiving. It also reminds us just how incredible this all is. 
• Having a hard moment? Something doesn't go the way you had hoped or expected? Someone says something that rattles you? Feeling the stress of too much of something or too little of something? Witness someone else or a group having a hard time? Bring in compassion. It's that simple. Don't push the pain or upset away; don't even try to fix anything just yet. Recognize suffering with a tender heart and be kind. Start simply. Feel the pain and form a phrase of loving-kindness. "May I have peace of mind. May I have relief. Or may he/she/they be gentle with themselves. May they feel loved." Whatever phrase brings relief, offer it up. Hard moments don't need to be met with more hardness. 
• Feel yourself trying to control a situation? These are good moments to remember that all things change. Let it go. Easier said than done, but start with simple things. Someone cuts you off, let it go. Forgot to do something, let it go. Your appointment gets canceled, let it go. Newly washed car gets pooped on, let it go. Start small and practice releasing the things that, in the big picture, don't matter so much (at the end of your life you won't care). When we let ourselves find more flexibility with the small stuff, when the larger things happen, we have more resiliency, more faith, more understanding that this, too, will change.

We can't fail at mindfulness.It would be kinder to think less of seeing some grand change, but instead, allow ourselves to fill our days with micro-moments of presence, gratefulness, compassion, connection, and letting go and this is a "perfect" picture.

Wishing you a beautiful week.