Effortful or Effortless Presence?

"You don't have to work hard to be present."  I shared this line in a group one day and it caught someone's attention. Something about hearing it was a relief. I then realized that the opposite could also be true -- that it does take a lot of effort to be present. It takes a certain kind of energy to stay right here with whatever we may be doing. We explored the subject in A Mindful Life group and arrived at many of the ways presence takes energy and steadfastness, as well as how presence is about letting go and releasing control. They are both true. Below are  some of the things that we arrived at. In listing them, I am finding them to be  helpful reminders. I invite you to try them on, too. Take a breath we each one and see how they feel as you name them.

Presence can become effortless when:

• we stop trying to be something other than we are
• we let ourselves slow down and be still
• we stop leaning ahead into what the other might say or do so that we can be ready with the "right" response
• we stop resisting what is and allow what's here  
• we let go of arriving somewhere/of expectations
• we trust in others' goodness and intrinsic wisdom 
• we let go of judgement and criticism (those take a lot of effort!)
• we listen and only listen when we do
• we choose to release physical effort/contraction (habitual tension)
• we breathe more fully
• we allow ourselves to be vulnerable, make mistakes, be imperfect
• we recall our interdependence with everything when fear comes to visit 

This is a nice time of year to practice using less effort. This week, how might you allow yourself this gift of relaxing into presence? It requires us to receive and not to strive and grasp. It requires us to let go and trust that we won't be separated and that we will always be filled. What would that look like to you? When I try it on, I think of walking with a softer foot fall, using a lighter touch, listening without working on a response at the same time, following my breathing whenever I think of it; letting others in without fear because I trust in myself and the goodness of others.

Wishing you a week of easy presence and much joy.

🌻
Jean

P.S. I'm going to offer another Beginning Meditation Series in August if you want to learn the basics before the fall begins so that you can enter it with tools you can use. If you are interested, I need 5 to make it happen, so please register now so we can make it happen for you!