Thursday, September 1, 2022

Chasing Sunsets


We just returned from vacation and I feel refreshed and happy to begin again. I can’t say it was restful, but it was replenishing. My friend and I went back and forth on how there are all kinds of vacations and I think it is helpful to recognize. Some bring rest, some bring excitement, some bring action, inspiration, or connection. If we expect it to be all things we can run into disappointment. This vacation was just what I needed it to be.

On this trip, I came to understand just how much my kids like tradition. Maybe it's our non-traditional family that draws them to want to repeat experiences, return to familiar places, honor the same rituals. Or maybe all kids do? I don't mind. Life asks us to stretch in so many other ways, maybe it's okay for things like vacations to be familiar. How else do you get to know the family owned restaurant in town, the climbing instructor who you trust your life with, the pond that's safe to swim great distances in, the rock that you can jump from, the best place to get lobster rolls, and the walks where not many people will be?

I try my best to give everyone some of what they want on vacation. My daughter loves sunsets and sunrises. To fill that place of awe in her, I chose an evening to go to a quiet place on Mt. Desert Island where we could catch it. We arrived early and walked onto the dock, taking some photos as we waited. This boat pictured above was what caught my eye. At 7:47, the time the sun was predicted to set, the sky was pretty, but not spectacular. Everyone was chilly (believe it or not with this heat wave going on) and they were ready to leave and have the dinner that was waiting back at the cottage. I surrendered my wish to have them awed and chalked it up to a night without a stunning sunset. As we drove back, I noticed the sky to my left was now lit up in shades of pink, but  we no longer had the view as the trees were taking the best seats. It turned out we were just too early.

And the night before…we were too late. We were driving when we saw a bit of the stunning sky, but we couldn't pull over. We kept driving in a hurry to find another opening among the trees and mountains and chose the high school as our spot. The kids asked us to stop the car and they started running toward the field. Mike and I drove around to the other side of the school where upon finding a better view, we hurried back to get the kids and bring them there. The scene was comical. Kids and a car chasing the sunset. The light was changing by the second and by the time we got out, we clearly missed the best of it.

Sure enough on our last night, Mike and I went out to pick up food and on the way home, the most unbelievable sunset was lighting up the lake. Another "pull over, pull over!" ensued and I ran across the street to capture it for Ella. This time, I did.

Sometimes we arrive at things too early, sometimes too late, and sometimes right on time. All of it is amazing because it is all fleeting. Things arise and they fade away. If they didn't change, if they were permanent, like plastic, we wouldn't have anything to get excited about. We would rarely feel a sense of awe. We need change and impermanence to fall in love. Again and again. 

On the surface, our yearly vacation hasn’t changed much in years. It isn't exotic. It doesn't make us more "worldly." But every year, I am aware that my kids are no longer the same and because of that, this yearly tradition of going to Maine is always changing, always a new experience. The impermanence of our age and of this time with the ones we love makes it all unique and special. When we remember this, we realize that we don’t need a lot of original experiences or excitement to be content, to be amazed by life, to be happy. It is always rich and the impermanence of it, chasing the sunset, is what makes it even more so.

🌻

Jean

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